Pittsburgh Americans No Longer to Play 7-man

As of July 28, 2008, the Pittsburgh All-Americans have decided to no longer play NPPL or any other form of 7-man paintball. By dropping their concentration from the 7-man format, they can focus more on playing X-ball. Prior to their decision of only playing X-ball, the All-Americans played in the NPPL, NXL, and the Millenium Series. Even though the All-Americans will not be playing 7-man, some of their players will be guesting for the rest of the season on other teams.

Paintball Shot Finds Cancer

Gary Burrow’s, 51, was in the field and was struck by a paintball at Skirmish in Nottingham in January 2005. The paintball hit was under his chin. In an attempt to reduce the swelling from the impact, Burrow put ice over the welt, but two months later, inflammation reoccured and he sought out medical attention. Turns out, the lump was Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. Months after the cancer removal, doctors found that there were two more lumps in his groin. As of now, Burrow is receiving chemotherapy for lumps in his stomach amd chest. Burrow says he owes his life to paintball because if he hadn’t got shot in the neck that day, he would not be here today.

Portland, CT: Home of FAIL

OK, so here’s the deal. Some kid shot another kid in the face at a so called paintball birthday party. Apparently, they decided shooting someone in the face was a good idea, especially when he had no mask on…fucking genius. And of all places they played in someone’s backyard, now only if there were places that were specifically designated for playing paintball with rules and regulations and proper supervision.

Good ‘ol backyard paintball play. Seemingly, adults with little to no experience with paintball guns are qualified to supervise. Hey kids, wear a mask while you’re playing a game but when we’re done you can take your mask off but still play with the guns. Don’t worry, it’s ok, nothing bad will happen.

Blind boy’s mommy wants to ban paintball guns in Portland, CT, which apparently does exist. She says she wants to prevent this type of accident from ever happeneing again, so which brings to mind, how many fucking dumbasses are in Connecticut?

I would like [a paint ball gun] to be treated like a rifle or a pistol; it’s something that can do damage to you, just like a rifle.

So a paintball gun that shoots balls of paint can shoot theoretical bullets that can kill people. You what else can do damage to you? Paper! Paper cuts hurt like a fucking bitch.

My personal feeling is that these teenagers are too young and inexperienced to know how to be safe with it.

Translation: Your kid is a fucking idiot and can’t do anything. He’s a piece of shit and doesn’t deserve to live. He should just kill himself.

I would basically blame those kids’ parents. … They are not taking responsibility for their kids

OMG! Will someone please think of the children!

Then you have genius commentary like this. Yeah, requiring people to be 18, that’s a good idea. Why not 21, since that’s when you can drink, legally. Or 25, since that’s when renting a car is cheaper. Or hell, why not 65, since that’s when you can get social security. God damn, I love assigning arbitrary ages on something that has absolutely no research to prove it relevant other than the thinking of children campaign. Stupid fucktards.